Reporters say she was crying through the entire process and, when Judge Michael Sauer gave his decision, she let out a huge cry and said, "This isn't right!" She was then physically dragged out of the courtroom by a female deputy, in tears, screaming, "Mom! Mom! Mom!"
Some witnesses say they saw a rainbow above the courtroom. And others say they saw a giant man in the clouds with a white beard nodding his head approvingly. And me? Well I saw Judge Michael Sauer grow to be twelve feet tall, with muscles the size of tree trunks. And when he smiled, little cartoon hearts appeared above my head, and tiny yellow birdies tied brightly-colored bows in my hair while they chirped merrily in my ears.
UPDATE: TMZ just posted the judge's court order to bring Paris back to court. Take a look.
I'm no graphologist, but I'd say that judge is pissed!
4 comments:
You evil man, leave Paris alone.
1. Was the sentence proportionate to the crime?
No. Most people with similar offenses serve no time at all, a few serve up to 2 or 3 days.
2. Assuming the sentence was appropriate, how long do most non-violent offenders serve in LA county?
10% of the sentence with credit for time served.
3. Why is that?
Well, about 18,000 of the 20,000 people hanging out in jail are serious felons. They're hanging 'em on hooks.
4. Who's responsible for running the jail?
Sheriff, that's part of the CA penal (teh, heh) code.
5. Which poor minority is going to receive worse treatment and less medical attention in jail because a gaggle of sheriffs and medicos are watching Paris Hilton cry softly in her sleep?
Statistically speaking that'll be some poor Latina or African American woman.
6. Would you rather Paris Hilton spend her own money dealing with her mental breakdown or would you rather she spent our state tax money having a psychiatrist and a bunch of psych techs on call to make sure Paris Hilton doesn't slash her wrists in jail?
We'd rather Paris spend her Daddy's money.
7. Who's jealous of Paris Hilton's stunning good looks, youthful vitality, lustrous blond hair, and sparkly white teeth?
Chris, that's who.
8. Who's in Love with Paris Hilton?
Tony, that's who. I mean the woman's got charisma.
9. Why was Paris sent to jail for 45 days?
She is in jail for violating probation and driving on a suspended sentence. Her DUI was pleaded down to a lesser offense. She does not have a DUI.
You know what Mark Twain thinks about all of this?
"The older we grow, the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without bursting one's clothes"
I don't know what that means, but Mark's pissed.
Shawshank Redemption was about a man who was falsely imprisoned...or am I being obtuse?
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