6. sean - May 25, 2008
Finally, the voice of reason stepped in:
"Have you ever kissed a girl??!?!?!?!?!"
It's an F-in cake. Turn-off your caps lock and and stop making trekkers look like such OCD losers.
1. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - A dutiful sense of responsibility combined with the subconscious desire to kill your idols brought Indiana Jones to $126 million, nestling it at #2, between Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End and X-Men: The Last Stand, on the chart of Horribly Disappointing Memorial Day Weekend Sequels.
2. The Chronciles of Narnia: Prince Caspian - The substantial drop to $28.6 million is widely thought to be related to Prince Caspian's running theme of not being Indiana Jones.
3. Iron Man - $25.7 million, which is still a ton when you consider that this is its fourth week, and that the film frequently digresses into quoting Swingers.
4. What Happens in Vegas... - $11.1 million, making it the most profitable marketing slogan-based movie since Where's the Beef? 2.
5. Speed Racer - $5.2 million, which isn't that bad if you disregard that it cost $120 million to cover Earth in a pupil-wrecking CGI lacquer.
You "can see it working out," eh? What gives you that impression? The tepid reception Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is getting? The fact that having a non-Indiana Jones lead in an Indiana Jones movie would remove the single expectation fans foolishly assumed you could consistently meet? The gust you felt across your beard as Earth sighed? I'm going to let this go for now, and hope this is Lucas's idea of a joke. Unfortunately, having seen all the Star Wars films, I know it's impossible that he could be that funny. Zing!
"Brit hit a red Ford Explorer, driven by a lady. No injuries, as far as we
know -- Britney didn't even get out of the car. Her bodyguard got out and talked
to the other woman.The red Explorer Brit hit is now following her back to
Britney's home.Britney was stopped at a light and, for some reason, accelerated
when the light was still red, hitting the Explorer stopped in front of her,
causing minor damage."
Dina Lohan will be recognized as a "mother of the year" by an organization whose charter undoubtedly requires a commitment to smoking crack rocks the size of Buicks. TMZ reports:
"Mingling Moms, a social networking organization for mothers, is naming
LiLo's mommie dearest one of its Top 20 Long Island Mothers of Celebrities at a
ceremony on Tuesday."
It should be noted that Dina earned a spot after a woman who drowned her kids in a tub filled with gasoline and Wheat Thins couldn't attend. Dina did have to agree to sign over legal custody of her youngest child, Cody. To which Dina replied: "Who? Oh, right, 'Boy-Lindsay'. Yeah, yeah. Sure, sure. Is that drink yours?"