"No Wonder," Woman.

It's about time.

Boy, Bye.

"Like Raisins In A Cookie."

Saves The Day.

29-34-1

I Will Follow.

Fascist Fetishist.

Constitutional Rights Optional.

"O brave new world that has such people in 't!"

Trump Goes Runnin'.

Dave Will Testify.

The Best Thing I Said Today.

"Look, it's like how you can't simply compare a tornado and a breeze. Sure, both are weather systems that can knock leaves off of trees, but only one of them is capable of pulling your house into the sky and forcing you to live with hundreds of little people."

Irony Can Be Pretty Ironic Sometimes.

Wait... on the Fox News website?

19-21-1

What You Need To Know About False Equivalence.

Now, make sure you're registered to vote... this is not a choice between "the lesser of two evils."

Goodall, For Good And All.

I Want To Believe.

Who Says Reeds Bend?

Not Harry Reid, tellyouwhat.

The Best Thing I Said Today.

"It's like that frustration you feel when you're trying to reload a Pez dispenser... except you don't get any Pez."

Worst Album Cover Ever?

There's Always Room For Cellos!

There's Always Room For cellos!

8-9-1

While You Were Creeping.

Your 2016 NFL cheerleader squads:

Arizona Cardinals Cheerleaders

Atlanta Falcons Cheerleaders

Baltimore Ravens Cheerleaders

Buffalo Jills

Carolina Topcats

Chicago Honey Bears

Cincinnati Ben–Gals

Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders

Denver Broncos Cheerleaders

Detroit Lions Cheerleaders

Green Bay Packers Cheerleaders

Houston Texans Cheerleaders

Indianapolis Colts Cheerleaders

Jacksonville ROAR

Kansas City Chiefs Cheerleaders

Los Angeles Rams Cheerleaders

Miami Dolphins Cheerleaders

Minnesota Vikings Cheerleaders

New England Patriots Cheerleaders

New Orleans Saintsations

New York Jets Flight Crew

Oakland Raiderettes

Philadelphia Eagles Cheerleaders

Pittsburgh Steelerettes

San Diego Charger Girls

San Francisco Gold Rush

Seattle Sea Gals

Tampa Bay Buccaneers Cheerleaders

Tennessee Titans Cheerleaders

Washington Redskins Cheerleaders

We're Still Building And Burning Down Love.

Stand Together Or Fall Apart.

"Yeah, I Went To The Moon... Sucked."

Mooned.

GO HAWKS!

Joe vs. The Volcano? You LOSE, Volcano!

Worst Album Cover Ever?

Pew, Ewwwwwwwwwww....

Quien Es, Este Nino?

Look, we all know the matter/anti-matter drill: when two identical particles of each meet, everything goes. Instantly, violently, loudly... though no one would be left to hear.

So, look: this guy isn't me, but if he looked up? If we approached each other? The end of everything.

We didn't.

You're welcome.

And now, like Captain Kirk, I do believe the universe owes me one.

Stolen By Rebel Spies.

How did we never wonder about this story? #whocaresaboutfirstsentencesanyway

Cult Express.

You know, for subjugates!

Quickly! There Is No Time!*

*(left for you, yuppie dickhead)

Zombie Or Not A Zombie?