Saturday, May 20, 2006

Baby One More Time

Fuckin' Britney Spears. She's like a three-legged kitten running from a Roomba, or a car wreck you drive slowly past... you just can't look away. For instance, she says she's given up Kabbalah and replaced it with her son. Last Friday she made a posting on her official site saying: "I no longer study Kaballah [sic], my baby is my religion."

She probably wasn't too into it in the first place considering she can't even spell it right. Plus after seeing the way her life is turning out what else is she supposed to assume except that Kabbalah has failed her. Be reasonable.

Oh, and then there's Maude:

It wasn't that long ago crazed paparazzi drove Britney to drive her kid into traffic on her lap, remember?


Well she's up to her crazy baby-killing antics again, and has been photographed with an improperly installed child safety seat facing forward instead of backwards.

" "It's far safer if the seat is facing backwards to avoid head-on injuries and whiplash in case of a collision," said California Highway Patrol spokesman Tom Marshall. Spears, 24, "could be" cited for violating Section 27360 of the California Vehicle Code, which says child safety seats must be installed to comply with the federal standard. "We would have to witness the violation. We can't issue a citation from a photograph," Marshall said. "It's a bit of a gray area," he added, because state code doesn't specify the backward installation - a federal regulation does. Spears' rep did not return calls for comment yesterday. "We strongly urge anyone who is uncertain of how to install a car seat to come down to one of our headquarters and get help. We offer that service free of charge," said Marshall."

You'd think Britney would have done a little research on how to raise a baby, but it really looks like she's just winging the whole thing. At this rate the baby will end up tied to the hood of the car with rope, or taped to the door, and I'm sure, eventually, just tossed in the trunk. Because hey, people can't yell at you about your baby if they can't actually see it.

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