Spirit Squad

So, here's the thing: I haven't been feeling so Xmasy.

For the last, oh, 39 years, I've always felt quite Xmasy... at Xmas anyway. I've enjoyed decorating; I've baked (Yeah? So?). I've reveled in shopping; I haven't minded parking. I've never sung a carol, but I've always happily listened. I've found the joy in lights and wreaths and kids hopped-up on sugar and online wish lists. I've been, dare I say it, "merry."

But not so much this year. I don't know why. I have more to be wistful about than ever; I have more to be happy about than I ever dared dream. If I was into thanking imaginary beings for things, I'd have more to thank Paris and Jesus and Regis for than ever before. By rights, I should feel Xmasy... right?

But 'till today? Nope... not so much.

So what happened today?

Nancy watched A Christmas Carol and A Charlie Brown Christmas with me. She never wept, but damn if she didn't smile... and that, my friends, was the best gift I could have hoped for. See, Nancy has more reasons to hate Xmas than Yoda has Midi-chlorians, but today? Today she smiled at Linus reciting New Testament chapter and verse. That is the spirit of Xmas, my friends: A Jewish girl who's family and faith never gave her a reason to love Xmas loving the dopiest aspects of it for even a few minutes because it would make her husband happy.

It really is an Xmas miracle. We've always enjoyed the holidays, and done our best to celebrate both Hanukkah and Xmas each year, but never in my wildest dreams would I have thought that one year I'd be the cynical one, while Nancy was the spirited, optimistic one who draggged me back from the brink of holiday doldrums. That's not to say I never thought she could... I just never imagined it'd be necessary.

The ghost of Christmas? Present.

Speaking of Xmas miracles, Week 13 is in the books... and I made the playoffs! Well, in one league, anyway. That's right... I've been asterisked! Check it out:

*1. San Diego Zoo 11-2-0
*2. Kirk's nightmare 10-3-0
*3. Arsenal 8-5-0
*4. Turd Burglars 8-5-0
*5. Gotham Knights 8-5-0
*6. Last & Least Too 7-5-1
7. Super Chargers 7-6-0
8. Budwipers 6-6-1
9. Wade Reeves QB 6-7-0
10. AggieDucks 5-8-0
11. Las Vegas Heat 5-8-0
12. kimpossible 5-8-0
13. The Nation 4-9-0
14. Cyanide 0-13-0

Yup, I won, and leapt to 5th place in the office Yahoo league, and secured a playoff berth! That makes this week do-or-die time... hero? Or the goat? Only guru points and five-star ratings will tell... but I'm optimistic that I'll come out on top, and go on to game 2/3 of the Yahoo playoffs... where, like as not, I'll be crushed.

One cool thing: I have the league's leading running back, and my opponent? He has the league's second-highest rated running back... it's a clash of the titans... except, you know, Harry Hamlin and Claymated sea monsters won't be at all involved.

Speaking of taming shrews, I got whupped in the ol' NFL.COM league. Guess that makes me the shrew in that scenario. I'm okay with that. It was an ugly loss. Stare into your reflective shield and take a look:

East Division
AntiBushTexans 7-6-0
Metropolis Meteors 6-7-0
jump 5-8-0
Crawford Vaqueros 3-9-1

Central Division
Eau Claire Charlatans 9-4-0
blueflames 9-4-0
marauders 8-5-0
San Jose Synecdoche 7-6-0

West Division
COSTA RICAN PANTHERS 9-4-0
METRO ALLSTARS 7-5-1
Jimbo 5-8-0
scurvy dawgs 2-11-0

I lost, and sunk to second. Here's how it shakes out: to make the playoffs I have to win, while the #1 team in my division needs to lose... to Tony... who, unfortunately has been wallowing in losses of late.... So unless Tony turns it around and wins come Monday night, I'm hosed.

Meanwhile, Joe is dominating the Central Division! He clobbered his division rival last week, and meets another less-talented division foe this week. Nancy faces Joe's closest competitor this week in a game that means little to her in practical terms, but no one is more competitive than Nancy, so she's not lying down for the game, tell you what. Sad to say, win or lose she's out of wild card contention... which sucks.

But you know what? Though the chips are down, and we're facing stiff competition this week, we're not giving up. We have hope, and grit, and despite our shared cynicism, yeah... we have faith. Maybe just in each other... but that kinda' faith? Well, that's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.