The Brit Goes On

Oh, Oracle... speak to us:

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

So... Page Six reports Britney Spears was a complete mess before her Dateline interview with Matt Lauer last week. When they showed up to her Malibu mansion they found her alone without any of her publicists, and she insisted on doing her own hair and makeup -which was the latest in a really long chain of really bad ideas for the Britster- and one of her fake eyelashes even fell off when she started crying during the interview. You think Kathy Griffin is gonna' have something to say about that?

"When [the NBC crew] got there, they thought they had the wrong day . . . During the interview, no one was there to rein things in," we're told. Spears, when asked about Kevin Federline being with a pregnant Shar Jackson when they first met, shot back, "Julia Roberts' husband had a pregnant wife when he hooked up with Julia, but no one ever talked about that!" Spears wore flip-flops, a see-through tank and micro-mini jeans. Reps tried to control the damage on Friday. "They asked NBC not to release footage to places like E!," said a source. Asked why Spears was on her own for the interview, Sloane Zelnick said, "Britney is a grown-up and makes her own decisions."

If you happened to miss the interview, don't worry... I've posted the entire thing here, god help you. Britney obviously doesn't come off as very bright (What? You expected otherwise?), but the best part is seeing her try to use air quotes when she clearly doesn't know how to. Oh wait, no idea "how" to.