Federal (Head)Case

Stop that pigeon now!

Britney Spears' father and attorney Andrew Wallet (hee hee) will continue their conservatorship over Britney until March 10. Yesterday's hearing also placed Britney's brother Bryan into the ongoing legal clusterfuck. People reports:

"Britney's father and Wallet were also granted the power to handle the singer's taxes, and Britney's brother Bryan, 30, was named as a trustee of her trust. According to court papers, trust funds are used "to pay for Britney's continued security, and to pay for her medicine, food, other day-to-day expenses and for psychiatric and other medical services."

Sam Lutfi is still hiding and has yet to be served the now two-week old restraining order. He's rumored to be behind a New York lawyer's attempt to make Britney's legal troubles a federal case, according to an insider for OK! Magazine:

"He's upset because he can't see Britney and have her pay him money," explains the insider. "If Sam gets paid, then he can pay the lawyer and Sands. It's all ludicrous."

As for whether there is any merit to this motion, the insider tells OK!, "I'd be willing to bet that aside from Sam and Sands grandstanding on the courthouse steps, this is the last we hear about it."

I think the federal government has more dire and pressing issues on their plate than worrying about Britney Spears. I'm talking about matters of grave national security... like determining exactly what Roger Clemens injected into his ass. Okay, in hindsight, these dudes have time on their hands. Let's get America's braless sweetheart in front of Congress and pray those old bastards survive the experience... or not.