Run, Run Rudolph.
Friday, November 30, 2007
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Revealing
Those folks at Empire Online are such teases. They have a new picture of the Joker, but rather than just showing it so the world can breath a sigh of relief and say, yes, that is Heath Ledger wearing a pinstriped purple suit and panda/clown makeup while making a pouty face, they're slowly revealing it throughout the week.Seems the image is being uncovered a square at a time, so right now all you can see is the above image of his feet. As you'd expect, the unadulterated madness of the Joker does not hinder him from buying fancy dress socks, so long as they fit his particular color scheme. Buying expensive socks at Banana Republic is so crazy!
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Little (Robot) Wing

Jehosaphat's boots! The XPV R.A.D. Robotic Air Defense toy ($65) is billed as an "awesome flying robot toy". While it does fly, and the figure attached does light up and do some talking, I'm hard pressed to call him a robot. I expect more out of a robot than blinking eyes and missile sounds. However, the thing still seems pretty cool.
"Capable of performing amazing aerial stunts. Flight range of over 300 feet. Flies up to 30 MPH and over 20 stories. New, super-light stealth styling inspired by real stealth planes. Twin turbo engine design. Made with impact resistant material. Includes first aid vehicle repair kit. Detachable blaster included. 2 Channel controller."
Not only that, but the thing drives on land and the XPV battery charger can charge other USB devices you may have on you. Whoo-wee! Last Christmas I bought one of those micro-helicopters for myself because no one else loves me. It was pretty fun until I wrecked it in the ceiling fan trying to evade a cat. This year I may treat myself to one of these bad boys and chase squirrels around the yard. Because that's what you do when you have no friends.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Too Wrecked To Care, Anyway
"On Friday morning, "Blackout" stands at No. 59 on Amazon.com. It’s also No.
13 on iTunes, which means that its downloading days are dwindling as well.A new
single, “Piece of Me,” is getting some airplay including on the nation’s top pop
station, New York’s Z-100. But that doesn’t seem to make much of a
difference."
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Wonder Twin Powers: Activate!
These 8-year old twins, tired of being bullied, have developed wedgie-proof underwear, the Rip-Away 1000s. This may be the greatest internet video of all time, those poor little bastards. It may also be the saddest. You just have to watch. The only problem is, I failed to hear any mention of swirlie-proof heads, indicating these kids still have plenty years of torture ahead of them.Saturday, November 24, 2007
Fantasy Recap, Week 11: I'm Only Sleeping
Week 11 has gone by... and I tell ya', it's almost like I slept through it. Now that the bye weeks are over, I could almost leave a lineup alone. I don't, y'understand... but I could. Catchers in the Rye
Projected: Win
Actual: Loss 84-90
Sith Lords of the Gridiron
Projected: Loss
Actual: Win 109-76
The Powerful Mach 5!
Projected: Win
Actual: Win 118-59
Blue Blazer Regulars
Projected: Loss
Actual: Loss 203.00-366.50
Live Free; Rhyme Hard
Projected: Win
Actual: Win 265.16-223.06
*1. Death by Haiku 9-2-0
*2. BALCO 8-3-0
*3. Flatulence Blasts! 8-3-0
4. The Pastry Ducks 7-4-0
5. The Flying Frenchman 7-4-0
6. San Diego Zoo 6-5-0
7. LightsOut 6-5-0
8. Livefree; Rhymehard 4-7-0
9. Bliss's Blitzers 4-7-0
10. Baby Bashers 4-7-0
11. Alabama Hot Pockets 3-8-0
12. ativan stat 0-11-0
* Clinched Playoff Spot
Friday, November 23, 2007
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Monday, November 19, 2007
Could Drive A Kid To Drink... And Would
"Orders were made," Kaplan said upon leaving the courtroom. "I can't discuss
the content of those orders. Documents have not been released by the court, and
I don't know if they will be. The matter will be continued at a future
date."
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Fantasy Recap, Week 10: Lay Your Hands On Me
I'm in five leagues this year. Two of those I run, and in those two? I can't even tell you how many people are looking to me for answers. Questions about line-ups, or rankings or stat corrections, and not a one of those asking seems to consider the possibility that it's really not in my best interest to help them, since we are in competition.... Yet, help them I do, and I have to think that this is just how jesus felt. Only I have more comfortable shoes.So, in the spirit of our li'l allegory, I'll keep this brief.
In my NFL.COM league? Won!
Catchers in the Rye
Projected: Loss
Actual: Win 86-56
East
Catchers in the Rye 6-4-0
LacesOu 5-5-0
Eau Claire Vandals 4-6-0
Textboo 4-6-0
Central
Tiny Adorable Hedgehogs 6-4-0
Death by Haiku 2 5-5-0
Goregor 3-7-0
RumseyB 2-8-0
West
DredPir 8-2-0
HolyHan 8-2-0
Mothers 6-4-0
Underdo 3-7-0
Some other NFL.COM league? Won!
Sith Lords of the Gridiron
Projected: Loss
Actual: Win 110-92
Central
Clemson 6-3-1
LofasLa 6-4-0
UsualSu 5-5-0
Sith Lords of the Gridiron 3-6-1
East
BBbadbo 7-3-0
FBomber 6-4-0
Knights 6-4-0
royals1 5-5-0
West
TeamAlp 5-5-0
Lynchbe 4-6-0
YounGGu 3-7-0
FifeFan 3-7-0
That league I used to be undefeated in? Lost!
The Powerful Mach 5!
Projected: Win
Actual: Loss 67-81
Central
Powerful Mach 5! 8-2-0
Provide 6-4-0
JediMas 5-5-0
Bigbron 2-8-0
East
NEPats 7-3-0
baldeag 5-5-0
Skeleto 2-8-0
ItaliHe 2-8-0
West
Provide 8-2-0
xchucki 8-2-0
KNIGHTS 5-5-0
Breakin 2-8-0
My Yahoo! league? Won!
Blue Blazer Regulars
Projected: Win
Actual: Win 229.62-296.12
*1. Purple Flat. Blasts 8-2-0
*2. Night Train 8-2-0
3. De chier des bulles 7-3-0
4. Blue Blazer Regulars 7-3-0
5. MightyPurpleHelmets 5-5-0
6. Extreme Hummingbird 4-6-0
7. Snooze Alarm 4-6-0
8. LiL Man 3-7-0
9. Purple People Eaters 3-7-0
10. Intercepticons 1-9-0
* = Clinched Playoff Spot
The office Yahoo! league? Won!
Live Free; Rhyme Hard
Projected: Win
Actual: Win 268-205
*1. Death by Haiku 8-2-0
*2. Flatulence Blasts! 8-2-0
3. The Pastry Ducks 7-3-0
4. BALCO 7-3-0
5. The Flying Frenchman 7-3-0
6. San Diego Zoo 5-5-0 .
7. LightsOut 5-5-0
8. Bliss's Blitzers 4-6-0
9. Livefree; Rhymehard 3-7-0
10. Alabama Hot Pockets 3-7-0
11. Baby Bashers 3-7-0
12. ativan stat 0-10-0
* = Clinched Playoff Spot
So there you go. Won 4 of 5... and it doesn't look like it'll take a miracle to make the playoffs in at least two leagues. Blessed be.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Knife Blocked
Tellyouwhat, the Throwzini Knife Block isn't your ordinary knife receptacle. Okay it is, but at least it looks good. Iresembles the "Rotating Wheel of Puncture Wounds" I saw at a circus once as a kid. It was awesome, the dude caught a knife right in the leg. Blood was spurting like a ruptured fire hydrant. Urban Trend will be selling these soon, for an undisclosed price. I managed to get my hands on one early, and I've got to say I'm a little disappointed. I thought you were actually supposed to throw the knives into the slots, and that magnets or something would guide them into their holes. I ended up losing the two smallest toes on my right foot, my left thumb, and a cat before I figured out that's not how it works.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Jingle Belle
So, as I'm sure you all know, Jessica Simpson co-hosted The View yesterday. To no one's real surprise, she didn’t really talk much when it came to current events. She plugged her new fashion line then resorted to her trademark blank stare for the rest of the show, according to Page Six:"She was never intended to be on the show as a moderator," noted an insider
who alerted Page Six to the episode. "It was all a big plug for her label -
Jessica barely even talked to the guests."
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Pop Star
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Balls On My Fingers & Time On My Hands

{insert ring pun here}
Okay ladies (and men who like wearing jewelry), here comes a novel ring concept by Charles Windlin! It's a ring watch that uses 1,400 metal balls to tell the time. Each ball has a decorative and magnetic side, and is electrically activated to show the appropriate side to either tell the time or display a message. Charles claims that the ring uses far less energy than an LCD display. You know what else uses far less energy than an LCD display? A sundial. Except when you have to use a flashlight to read it at night. Then you're using batteries.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Monday, November 12, 2007
High Concept
I don't know what's more annoying about this "concept art" for the upcoming Astro Boy: the fact that they're deciding to make concept art at all (are the 50 years worth of manga not enough?), or that they're making such pathetic little changes. More metal stuff on the arm gun? Brilliant. If anything, make him less naked, or at least do something that would distinguish him from a cyborg Big Boy.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Smart Mouse. Dumb Terminal.
The Brain Gold Mouse is a mouse that loosely resembles a golden brain. Or exactly resembles a golden brain, if brains were actually golden. It's made by Pat Says Now, features 800 DPI, and costs a staggering $43. Why this product exists is a mystery to me. It seems stupid, yet I have to assume it's for people who want other people to know just how smart they are. I heart an ironic brain mouse!
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Fox On The Run
Britney Spears ran a red light at a dangerous intersection while trying to use her cell phone recently. Not only were her kids in the car, but so was the court-appointed monitor. She’s already in love with Britney to begin with, so I’m sure a near-death experience just strengthened the bond. The whole thing was captured on tape and will probably spell trouble for Britney considering the judge doesn't approve of her driving. TMZ reports:"The Popwreck approached the light slowly on Coldwater Canyon. You then see
Britney raise her cellphone to her face. It is unclear if she's texting or
making a call. She then drives into the intersection as someone outside the car
screams, "Red light, red light!" Britney then turns left onto Mulholland Drive,
managing to miss oncoming traffic."
Friday, November 09, 2007
Fantasy Recap, Week 9: Don't Stop Believing
Nine weeks down. The clock is tickin'.So, the big news? I lost my first game in that NFL.COM league. Dammit.
The Powerful Mach 5!
Projected: Win
Actual: Loss 94-104
Central
Powerful Mach 5! 8-1-0
Provide 6-3-0
JediMas 4-5-0
Bigbron 2-7-0
East
NEPats 7-2-0
baldeag 4-5-0
Skeleto 2-7-0
ItaliHe 1-8-0
West
Provide 7-2-0
Xchucki 7-2-0
KNIGHTS 4-5-0
Breakin 2-7-0
The good news is the guy in second in my division lost as well, so I'm holding my own.
Over in that "How much more can this suck?" league? I lost. Who's surprised?
Sith Lords of the Gridiron
Projected: Win
Actual: Loss 86-129
Central
LofasLa 6-3-0
Clemson 5-3-1
UsualSu 4-5-0
Sith Lords of the Gridiron 2-6-1
East
FBomber 6-3-0
BBbadbo 6-3-0
Knights 6-3-0
royals1 4-5-0
West
Lynchbe 4-5-0
TeamAlp 4-5-0
YounGGu 3-6-0
FifeFan 3-6-0
I have a feeling I'm not making the playoffs in this league.
In my NFL.COM league? I Lost.
Catchers in the Rye
Projected: Loss
Actual: Loss 80-110
East
LacesOu 5-4-0
Catchers in the Rye 5-4-0
Eau Claire Vandals 4-5-0
Textboo 4-5-0
Central
Tiny Adorable Hedgehogs 5-4-0
Death by Haiku 2 4-5-0
RumseyB 2-7-0
Goregor 2-7-0
West
DredPir 8-1-0
HolyHan 8-1-0
Mothers 5-4-0
Underdo 2-7-0
Mario lost as well, so again, I'm holding my own. Now if Mario would have the decency to lose a few games, I could take the division over and make the playoffs!
In the office Yahoo! league? I lost. Again. Dammit.
Live Free; Rhyme Hard
Projected: Loss
Actual: Loss 225.52-242.11
1. Death by Haiku 7-2-0
2. BALCO 7-2-0
3. Flatulence Blasts! 7-2-0
4. The Pastry Ducks 6-3-0
5. The Flying Frenchman 6-3-0
6. LightsOut 5-4-0
7. San Diego Zoo 4-5-0
8. Bliss's Blitzers 4-5-0
9. Alabama Hot Pockets 3-6-0
10. Baby Bashers 3-6-0
11. Livefree; Rhymehard 2-7-0
12. ativan stat 0-9-0
If I could string together a few wins, I could actually make the playoffs (the top 8 teams make the playoffs). The tricky part? Stringing together the wins.
Finally, in my Yahoo! league... I won!
Blue Blazer Regulars
Projected: Loss
Actual: Win 308-254
1. Purple Flat. Blasts 7-2-0
2. Night Train 7-2-0
3. De chier des bulles 6-3-0
4. Blue Blazer Regulars 6-3-0
5. MightyPurpleHelmets 5-4-0
6. Snooze Alarm 4-5-0
7. Extreme Hummingbird 4-5-0
8. Purple People Eaters 3-6-0
9. LiL Man 2-7-0
10. Intercepticons 1-8-0
I actually beat the #2 team (the mysterious "Night Train"). Nancy, meanwhile, who barely looks at her roster, also won, and remains above me in the standings. If the playoffs were today, we'd play each other in the first round.
It's hard to believe that the playoffs are right around the corner. Of course, it's not all about the championship. Oh, no. It's not the destination, but the journey.
Thursday, November 08, 2007
These Aren't The Nerds You're Looking For
The NY Jedi Academy is kind of what it sounds like -- it's a school in New York that teaches nerds how to swing fake light sabers around like idiots. The founder talks about "hero-building", which was weird because I didn't see a single person in the video capable of lifting a truck off an elderly lady. Regardless, how can you call yourself a Jedi school with no classes in mind tricks? Or maybe when it comes to the NY Jedi Academy, the one mind trick is enough.
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
That's What Science Is All About, Charlie Brown!
Introducing the Gamerator! It's an arcade game cabinet with a chilled kegerator in the rear that holds a 1/4 keg. It comes preloaded with 187 classic games, and even has built in cupholders. They're on sale via ebay, and the bidding starts at $2,000. My only complaint with the unit is the capacity of the silver overflow collector. You know, because I'm going to be peeing in it a lot.
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Monday, November 05, 2007
AvPeeeeeyooooooooo
The problem with this Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem banner -aside from the concept it's promoting- is that this is like the lamest pose a Predator can make. If you could be there, at the Predator Bar Mitzvah (or wherever they get their learning claws), this is definitely what every 13-year-old Predator is doing."Did you see my claws, dude? Get a shot of me showing my claws. Wait, is the red light on? I want the red light on, too."
And this is clearly every Predator's senior picture. It's their equivalent to our holding the lame instrument you play in band.
Sunday, November 04, 2007
Saturday, November 03, 2007
WWSD?
Yup, that’s right. Slash wrote a book.
I’m going to assume without reading it that it will be the greatest book of our generation. Sure, it might not be an empowering tale of sisterhood, or inspiring ruminations on life after death. But what it will have is strippers. By the hundreds. And tales of Axel snorting coke from dog's colons. I’m pretty much going to throw away my copy of the Bible. Won’t be needing that anymore. Thanks, Slash!
Friday, November 02, 2007
Fantasy Recap, Week 8: Hammer Down
It's hammer time.Projected: Win
Actual: Win 109-46
LacesOu 5-3-0
Catchers in the Rye 5-3-0
Eau Claire Vandals 4-4-0
Textboo 4-4-0
Tiny Adorable Hedgehogs 4-4-0
Death by Haiku 2 3-5-0
RumseyB 2-6-0
Goregor 2-6-0
DredPir 7-1-0
HolyHan 7-1-0
Mothers 4-4-0
Underdo 1-7-0
Projected: Loss
Actual: Loss 53-86
LofasLa 6-2-0
Clemson 4-3-1
UsualSu 4-4-0
Sith Lords of the Gridiron 2-5-1
BBbadbo 6-2-0
FBomber 5-3-0
Knights 5-3-0
royals1 3-5-0
Lynchbe 4-4-0
YounGGu 3-5-0
TeamAlp 3-5-0
FifeFan 2-6-0
Projected: Win
Actual: Win 124-83
Central
Powerful Mach 5! 8-0-0
Provide 5-3-0
JediMas 4-4-0
Bigbron 2-6-0
NEPats 6-2-0
baldeag 4-4-0
Skeleto 2-6-0
ItaliHe 0-8-0
Provide 6-2-0
xchucki 6-2-0
KNIGHTS 3-5-0
Breakin 2-6-0
Projected: Win
Actual: Win 219.10-137.94
1. Death by Haiku 6-2-0
2. BALCO 6-2-0
3. Arsenal 6-2-0
4. The Flying Frenchman 6-2-0
5. The Pastry Ducks 5-3-0
6. LightsOut 5-3-0
7. Bliss's Blitzers 4-4-0
8. San Diego Zoo 3-5-0
9. Alabama Hot Pockets 3-5-0
10. Livefree; Rhymehard 2-6-0
11. Baby Bashers 2-6-0
12. ativan stat 0-8-0
In my Yahoo! league? I won!
Projected: Loss
Actual: Win 248-240
1. Purple Crap Stains 7-1-0
2. Night Train 7-1-0
3. MightyPurpleHelmets 5-3-0
4. De chier des bulles 5-3-0
5. Blue Blazer Regulars 5-3-0
6. Snooze Alarm 3-5-0
7. Extreme Hummingbird 3-5-0
8. LiL Man 2-6-0
9. Purple People Eaters 2-6-0
10. Intercepticons 1-7-0