Yay Interwebs!

Pixels

This is an animated short by Patrick Jean appropriately titled Pixels. It's all about oldschool games invading New York, nd I highly recommend you watch it right now whether you get fired or not.

Howdya like This Bigshot?

Nothing About This Image Is Not Wrong

Make it go!

Listen To Me Very Carefully....

WWZJD?

Dunroaminduncarindunlivin.

Fantastic?

Hello, The Future!

April (Song-Singin') Fools

ClayCoCo

Clay? Ash? Cool!

Evil Dead done in 60 seconds with CLAY - 2010 from Lee Hardcastle on Vimeo.

Crushed

Want to play video games with a girl but don't know any in real life? Well you're in luck, thanks to a new online service called GameCrush. For a minimum wage-y $6.60 you can play 10 minutes of XBox Live  with a scantily clad strumpet via webcam. Fun! Pathetic. That's so shameful I don't even know what to say.

"Girls somehow interested in this should know there's money to be made, with 60% of the proceeds from a match going to the "PlayDate", who at the conclusion of a game can be rated by the user on her "hotness, gaming skill, and flirtiness".
"GameCrush is restricted to those 18 years old and over, and players can select one of two kinds of match/date. I'll let the site's FAQ explain. "We have created two broad categories, "Flirty" and "Dirty" to help the PlayDate define and match her mood of gaming interaction and experience with those of the players. You can choose either option or both depending on how you feel!"

Under "Cool" In The Dictionary

Savage!

Bacon!

Roll this around on your tongue: "bacon beer." Sounds delicious right? Well how about, oh I dunno, BACON-INFUSED BOURBON SMOKED PORTER? If you want to make your own, Grocery Eats has a recipe, which doesn't involve actually brewing your own beer.

Shaaaaaaaaaarkish!

Try It In Dobly

Part III

I'm Here

Absolut Vodka has posted Spike Jonze's "I'm Here" short on the internet, so you should watch that at some point. Just a warning: the site says you must above the legal drinking age to watch, so I'm guessing it's not safe for work, either for content or because the constant reminder of vodka will send you back into a shameful spiral of alcoholism, and that should probably be postponed until at least after 5.

Anyway, click the pic.

Best Picture... And Best Picture!

Jeepers! Until a few minutes ago, I knew nothing of Fifth Element director Luc Besson's Les Adventures Extraordinaires D'Adèle Blanc-Sec. Now that I've seen the trailer, it's my most anticipated upcoming release that involves a 1912 lady adventurer, a mummy in a bowler hat, and a pterodactyl.

Adèle Blanc-Sec - Le film-annonce. sur Yahoo! Vidéo

It Was Really Just A Matter Of Time...

until someone misspelled "Hadron."

Dark Day

So, the World Wide Fund For Nature focuses on issues regarding conservation, research and restoration of the environment. And they encourage everyone to turn off their non-essential lights for Earth Hour on March 27th from 8:30 to 9:30PM to raise awareness for climate change. Which, whether you even believe in climate change or not, you've got to admit I am gonna go to the beach tomorrow.

They're Not Magic?

Don't worry, you're not the only one who thought there was an explosive genie trapped inside. I'm right here with you.

No Words.

What Are You?

Catman, get it? It's a take on Batman but with "cat" instead of "bat" because, I don't know if you could tell or not, but that's a cat in the picture. I know, I know, the mask threw me off too.

Berserker!

So, instead of dogs it's wolverines. But it's not just wolverines... it's Wolverines!

Winslow Homer was a hack.

Piece Of The Pi

So, it turns out it's, like. mid-March. I know, I thought it was still January too. But it isn't. It's March 14th, which -- 3.14 -- is Pi Day! And in five years it'll be 3.14.15. What a special one that'll be! And for everybody out there that's all, "it's actually 14.3.10 today," you know what -- YOU CAN'T RAIN ON THIS PI PARADE! YOU HEAR ME? You couldn't even hail on a cake walk!

Freeeeeeeeeeedom!

Or so, so not.

Handling Cans? Can Handle!

The Can Grip snaps on to any standard aluminum can providing the drinker with not only a handle, but a coaster. Yay future!

Get Hitched!

A Little Dab'll Do Ya'

"Color me up!" toilet paper serves as some sort of advertisement for some sort of company. I can't really read it, but their logo looks like a meditating Rasta. But that's not what's important, what's important IS THAT YOU STAY BETWEEN THE LINES!

You Know... Why Not?

So, Yay! 3D Models!

And The Oscar Goes To....

The Sincerest Form Of Flattery?

25 Or 6 To 10:35

Fair enough, the "Mc10:35" isn't actually a secret McDonald's menu item because you have to buy two separate sandwhichs and put them together yourself. However, it is rare and dangerously delicious looking.

"I heard about this from a cashier at one of the local McDonald's. He said it's getting kind of a cult following in San Francisco.

"1. Go to McD's right when they are transitioning from breakfast to lunch.

"2. Order one of the remaining Egg McMuffins from the breakfast menu and also order a McDouble since the lunch menu is now open.

"3. Take the egg and Canadian bacon from the Egg McMuffin and put it on the McDouble.

"The guy at the register said people call it a Mc10:35 because that's pretty much the only time you can pull this off.

"They're damn good when hungover!"

You know what else is damn good when hungover? A bacon and aspirin omelet. Also, puking helps sometimes.

iPWNED

Okay, that's clever... but I would have also torn off the top half of the green sign and penciled in "For a Good Time." No iPod AND solicitations for sexual favors -- you'll think twice before losing something else, Caroline!

And Yet...

OK Go!

Oh, Man.

Bad news for guys who can't grow a beard. A recent study finds that ind a little facial hair and a geeky personality the two biggest turn-ons.

"Despite complaining that it looks unkempt and feels rough to touch, the unshaven look on a man is actually a turn-on for 41 per cent of women.

"A slightly geeky personality came second, proving that women really do like a guy who knows their stuff when it comes to technology.

"A hairy chest was voted third, followed by a man who loves to read or cries at a soppy film. Other secret turn-ons to feature in the top ten include grey hair, glasses and being a passionate supporter of a sports team.

"The poll of 2,500 women also revealed that 91 per cent would actually prefer a guy who had a few flaws over someone who is perfect. And more than half would rather a guy who was soft and cuddly instead of toned and muscly."

Do You Think He Sawr Us?

Tinysaurs are little dinosaur models created by artist Kelly Farrell. They're cute as hell and you better believe I'm gonna' catch 'em all!

"Each one is laser cut out of oak tag board using a 35 watt cutting laser, and pre-perfed for (relatively) easy assembly - assuming you've got some really steady hands.

"The T-Rex, triceraptops, stegosaurus and woolly mammoth kits are all available over at Kelly's Etsy shop, the Maker's Market, or Everything Tiny and cost just $7 (USD) unassembled, and $16 with a pair of tweezers and glue in a handy gift tin."

Note: If you're a complete lazy-ass with no hand-eye coordination Kelly is also selling pre-assembled dinos in a little glass case for $60. I don't recommend those. You get no street-cred for buying things preassembled.

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Gah!

Okay... look: here's Lady GaGa in London recently and screw her outfit. Check out the look on her bodyguard's face. There's a man who went straight home, told his daughter he loved her, then bought ten ponies and a Lamborghini just to make sure she got the message.

BaCoN

This is a $16 elemental bacon shirt. It spells 'BaCoN' through the clever placement of three periodic elements: barium, cobalt and nitrogen. And I think we can all agree: bacon would be a lot less popular if it actually were barium, cobolt and nitrogen.

Run!

Robots: they suck and they're going to kill us all. And this informational graphic proves it. I think. Granted I didn't bother reading it, but that's because I already know everything there is to know about robots (see first sentence).

Oh, George.

These USB lightsabers come in red and green, light up when you plug them in and will set you back $20 for 1GB of storage. Amazingly, they're actual Lucasfilm licensed products from Japan.

Subliminal Character Alert!

I Really Think So

Kitty Litter

Dude, That's Deep.

Take a deeeeeeep breath, and click.

"Pot" Holder! Pot! POT! Get It?

Ohhhhh, I get it!

This is a $8 pot holder that's shaped like a pot leaf. It's a pun, get it? I don't but I'm gonna pretend like I do to seem hip to you younger cats. I'm a cool daddy-o, I jive. Let's get a lid and smoke the marijuanas!

Spidey, NO!

Okay... okaaaaaaaaay... I have absolutely no idea what the hell I just watched, but I have the feeling it's the reason the internet was invented.

Faster Than Liiiiiiightning....

VIDEOGIOCO by Donato Sansone from Enrico Ascoli - Sound Design on Vimeo.

Han It Over!

"Han Solo once bragged that the Millennium Falcon made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs...and now fans can give it their best shot with the all-new Star Wars R/C MILLENNIUM FALCON! For the first time ever, the MILLENNIUM FALCON -- the most beloved and iconic Star Wars ship of all-time -- is available as an indoor flying remote control vehicle. Measuring an impressive 11 inches long and 8 inches wide, the largest flying Star Wars R/C to date is highly detailed, easy to fly and includes a charging controller and vehicle battery for up to five minutes of flying time."

Time to buy!

Gone, Baby, Gone.

http://new.music.yahoo.com/doug-fieger/news/knack-lead-singer-doug-fieger-dies--61999134

All This For $2.16

It's On!

Watch Me Pull A Rabbit Out Of My Hat!

You get the feeling there's another half to this video, don't you?

Take THAT, Robot Overlords!

Mr. Atoz

This is a brief history of the universe and life on earth in 3:12 entirely in flipbook form. It was created by student Jamie Bell for an art class and didn't require any nude models despite Jamie insisting he needed them.

Dead Or Alive You're Coming With Me... Chicken.

NFL Presents: What If?

Super!

Bowled Over

Tequila? Unwise.

Thanks to being sucked into the vortex of an insane dwarf hellbent on splattering the world with its crazy, The Bodyguard Group was forced to issue a lengthy press release defending its credibility. This pretty much reads as basically every thing you've ever suspected about Tila coupled with the non-surprising fact that these poor bastards went through war zones and still couldn't tolerate her.

The Bodyguard Group Official Press Release

"For 43 years our Company The Bodyguard Group has never given an interview about any current or former client or written a letter such as in this instance, this is our first and ONLY press release, in fact 99% of our members work has NEVER been posted on our web site.

"However, at this juncture we felt it necessary to set the record straight about our dealings with Tila Tequila and her comments about us and the Hilton family and other Celebrities for the following reasons:

"Tila has serious self medication & emotional problems that we pray that she can get professional treatment and help with. The Bodyguard Group has tried a brief intervention with her once but failed to get through to her.

"As Combat Veterans we have seen our friends tragically die in combat before their time; Therefore we have a very high respect for life and for this reason we truly pray Tila can get help before it is too late.

"Although we felt and still do feel very sorry for her, when we saw the types of self medication she was taking and many other things we cannot talk about in this press release, we decided could we could NOT perform any work for her, but we did try and help by explaining to her she was going to overdose and die much too young like Heath, Anna, River and so many others who tragically died before their time, unless she changed her current self-medicating practices.

"When Tila told us she was broke and could not pay us, we gave her our services for free, we even arranged to take her to a high end jewelry & watch Pawn Shop so she could sell her extra rings and watches, to raise money for her family. We were deeply saddened to learn from the owner & head jeweler that her rings were not diamonds.

"She gave our company her word, no press, no paparazzi while we were there to give her a ride, she lied to us and had the paparazzi waiting for us when we walked out.

"We do not ever accept being lied to by a client, even if we are not getting paid, so that ended our relationship with Tila Tequila.

"We were NEVER aware of Tila tweeting negative things about The Hiltons and other Celebrities, until yesterday, that is why we are releasing this information today.

The father of Tila's baby

"We deny that our owner or any member of The Bodyguard Group is the father of Tila's baby, Tila told us the father of her baby is her high school sweetheart, a U.S. Army Combat Veteran, who served in Afghanistan and now lives in Texas.

"As for what Tila said that we said about Paris Hilton, Nikki Hilton, David Katzenberg, Bijou Phillips and several other Celebrities:

"The Hiltons have ALWAYS treated The Bodyguard Group members with 100% respect, every word Tila alleges that we have said about the Hilton's is 100% FALSE, Tila Tequila has been tweeting and saying we said negative things about Paris & Nikki Hilton, David Katzenberg, Bijou Phillips and several other Celebrities.

"We have NEVER said anything negative about Paris, Nikki or anyone else that our group has ever protected, met or known period.

"The fact is Paris Hilton, Nikki Hilton, the Hilton family, David Katzenberg, Bijou Phillips, Jon Voight, Jack Nicholson, Lindsay Lohan, Jessica Alba, Keanu Reeves, Eva Longoria, Conan O' Brien and hundreds of other Celebrities we have had any contact with have ALL been OUTSTANDING supporters of the U.S. Combat Veteran members of The Bodyguard Group and we are grateful for their support.

All of these celebrities and more have been kind enough to have taken photos with our U.S. Veteran members of The Bodyguard Group and have always treated our U.S. Veteran members extremely well, We will never forget your acts of kindness towards our members and friends."

Don't Ever Lego!

I always wanted one of those split-heart necklaces that you and your BFF were each supposed to wear half of, but I never got the chance. You see, I've never had a BFF. Or for that matter, even an F. Click for BFFs!

Bye, Bye.

Sigh.

Lorax!

Crying, Waiting... Mostly Crying, Really.

"The "11 stories of people crying in earnest", as the DVD's tag line states, include some that really don't seem so terrible but instead reflect the rigors of being an up & coming model in Japan's fiercely competitive "idol" culture:

* Marika, who was yelled at by her manager.

* Risa, who had been jilted by her boyfriend.

* Nana, who saw a bad picture of herself in a magazine.

* Shiho, who cried when her boyfriend said goodbye.

* Mai, who cried "touching the loneliness of the city"."

Wow, Japan... wow. You have officially crossed the line.

Port Man, Too!

You want a t-shirt with a giant AV panel on the back? Then you're in luck, because Threadless has them for $18 ($45 for a hoodie).

That Other Best Band You've Never Heard

Click.

Worth 1,000

So, we're told this is a picture of the internet:

Uh-huh. And where's the nudity?

Stenographers And Librarians

It's A (Chinese Finger) Trap!

The Best Band You've Never Heard

Become a fan!

Disturbing....

I'm not familiar with South Korean girl band Wonder Girls, but, to my credit, I stopped listening to new music in the 90's. But maybe you have. Regardless, this is a video of a bunch of stormtroopers dancing to their smash hit "Nobody..." and I think I speak for the entire Galactic Empire when I say, "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU GUYS THINK YOU'RE DOING?"



I smell a round of Force-chokes coming on!

And So It Goes Away

Can't You Read The Signs?

Why I Otter....

Fair's Fair

The Legend Continues...

Birth Of A Legacy

Whose House? Mamet's House!

Throwback... Throw Up... Same Difference.

Remember when an amazing movie like E.T. would become a dismal video game like this that would end up largely buried in a New Mexico landfill?

Relive the days of horrible film-to-video-game adaptations with this gallery of modern films reduced to Atari-level game covers!

Hood

Pun-Colored Glasses

Want to view life as one long-ass episode of Mystery Science Theater? Who doesn't, amirite? Well now you can thanks to these Mystery Science Theater 3000 glasses! Unfortunately, you'll still have to provide your own witty banter.

Mama Said: "Knock You Out!"

At Last I Can Sleep!

Ever wondered what Disney princesses would look like dressed as their villains? WELL, WONDER NO MORE MY CARTOON-LOVING COMPADRES!

What If You Could have Stopped Him Then?

Lampoon Or Tribute?

Either way, Jay's an ass. Though, if he does wind up leaving NBC after all, it turns out he can make me laugh. Whoda' thunk?

Lead Balloons

From the age before color.

How zeppelins were made! And no, Page and Plant weren't involved. Go figure. Go know.

Underneath The Bunker

The man on the left is Professor Henry Markram. Based on this picture alone he's clearly a mad scientist. Don't believe me?

"Professor Henry Markram, a doctor-turned-computer engineer, announced that his team would create the world's first artificial conscious and intelligent mind by 2018.

"And that is exactly what he is doing.

"On the shore of Lake Geneva, this brilliant, eccentric scientist is building an artificial mind. A Swiss - it could only be Swiss - precision- engineered mind, made of silicon, gold and copper.

"The end result will be a creature, if we can call it that, which its maker believes within a decade may be able to think, feel and even fall in love."

Riiiiiiiiight. No big deal... what's the worse that could happen?

WWSMJD?

How Much More Dapper Can He Be?

None.

None more dapper.

Ohhhhhh, You French!

The Dude Abideth

Click the pic!

"O unrightful judge!
This forfeiture is set in iron law
As drawn by great authority of league.
One roll might well determine that our side
Advance to glory; or be instead retired
As moss upon a tree-stump, while the
Smoke Drifts out to glorious summer.
Canst thou hear
The call of robin redbreasts?
If robin shall Restore amends, we must serve justice
Here. Be I wrong?"

You Say "Potato."

Cleese? Thank You!

Death By Chocolate By Chocolateweapons.com

Yeah, so you can get a hollow gun for $25 or a solid one for $30. Alternatively, for $6 I'll beat you within an inch of your life with a Snickers bar.

Tequilabot, Nooooooooo!

Now are you convinced?



Given any opportunity, a robot will leave you for dead and go get drunk.

Not So Quiet